There are things I don’t like. Heights for example. I wouldn’t go swimming in a deep sea either. I worry about falling. I fell many times. It is uncomfortable, painful and dumps your confidence.

But, I do believe, my past experience changed the way I perceive threads. I still worry how is my condition affecting the closest around me. It upsets me greatly. But fear for myself is not present.

I have my MRI this Friday and I have been pondering upon the notion of fear for the last few days. I used to get really anxious prior a scan, think about all the possible options. It isn’t there anymore. Maybe because I have been close to the very end, number of times, it made me stronger and immune to distress. Who knows. I wouldn’t say that I’m careless, I just don’t worry. Not about the big things anyway.

Perhaps, I learned how to cope better. Or I’m fearless. If worse comes to worst, I can try to assassinate Putin.